Today's three things Thursday post is a little special and personal because today marks our 4 year wedding anniversary!
My husband and I were friends for about a year before we started dating. And we dated for 2 & 1/2 years and were engaged for about a year before we got married. No matter how long you have been in a relationship with someone, marriage is definitely a whole different ball game!
All of a sudden you are sharing ALL of your space with someone 24/7. You are sharing future plans, bank accounts, design ideas (or lack therefore), grocery lists, laundry, etc. Even though Chirag and I are both Indian (Gujarati) and come from similar backgrounds, I didn't start to notice the little differences in the way we were raised until we go married. Even though his family has been in the States for a lot longer than mine, my in-laws are slightly more traditional than my parents. It's nice because they really withhold a lot of Indian traditions that my parents don't (as much). But it can also be a little harder to relate to them and understand where Chirag is coming from sometimes having been brought up slightly differently. I'm sure he feels the same way about me sometimes. But I guess this is probably true for most marriages.
Even though Chirag was born and raised in the States, he has a very traditional side to him as well. I think that's really what attracted me to him at first. To me, he somehow encompasses the perfect balance of the "traditional Desi" and the modern husband.
One: He is practical.
I tend to live on cloud nine and think a lot with my heart versus my brain. Chirag is the total opposite. He really thinks things through before acting on them. Sometimes when I ask him for advice, I almost get so annoyed because it will be something so practical and easy, but something that would have never crossed my mind in the first place. When I'm ready to buy a super extravagant teal colored sofa for our living room, he sways me towards practical, yet stylish grey version instead. He definitely keeps me grounded!
I have learned a lot from him over the years and I think he has learned to be more spontaneous and live a little on the edge with me once in a while as well. ;)
Two: He is very helpful.
Traditional Indian husbands are seldom very helpful to women. I really can't blame them entirely because it is in the way that they were raised and what is "norm" to them. They are raised to be the breadwinners and the woman is in charge of the house the kids.
However, in this day and age that is no longer the case. Lucky for me, even though my MIL is quiet traditional in some ways, she has raised her son to be super helpful around the house.
I have never really had to ask my husband for any help. He just automatically does it. He will help with all different types of chores in the house and is especially understanding when I have long hours at work. He also spoils by making breakfast on some weekends with his delicious omelette. He has even been a positive influence on my Dad and my Mom is always thanking him of that! :)
Three: He is understanding and caring.
Chirag and I are total opposites and it all became even more apparent after we got married. So, it wasn't always easy for either of us to truly understand where the other person was coming from.
Over the years, I have really seen my husband put in the effort to better understand me. He has come to realize that just because my thoughts and feeling don't make sense to him, doesn't mean that they aren't important in our marriage. It's not always easy for him, but I do see him trying and to me that's what love is all about.
We have both had to learn to adapt to the needs and wants of the other person.... learn to agree to disagree... and pick our battles. Marriage is a journey together and with each passing day we come to understand each other slightly better than we did yesterday.
Let's be real... I haven't been on cloud nine for all four years, but I truly have enjoyed our journey thus far. I believe that a marriage does take a lot of work... whether you are consciously putting in the effort or whether the effort just comes to you naturally. It takes two people to be fully involved in building a loving, happy, and lasting relationship together.
For all these reasons and many more, I feel very blessed and happy to be celebrating four years with this wonderful man today. We both try to be a positive influence in each other's lives and like a good challenge... so I'm looking forward to celebrating today by running our very first 5K together!
Here is to many more healthy and happy years together.
Are you interested joining #3TT? Please visit the hosts: Salma, Raj, or Nisha's blog, for all the details on how to join the linkup. It's a great way to meet some incredible bloggers and share any three things you'd like... the rules are super simple, so be sure to join in!
My husband and I were friends for about a year before we started dating. And we dated for 2 & 1/2 years and were engaged for about a year before we got married. No matter how long you have been in a relationship with someone, marriage is definitely a whole different ball game!
All of a sudden you are sharing ALL of your space with someone 24/7. You are sharing future plans, bank accounts, design ideas (or lack therefore), grocery lists, laundry, etc. Even though Chirag and I are both Indian (Gujarati) and come from similar backgrounds, I didn't start to notice the little differences in the way we were raised until we go married. Even though his family has been in the States for a lot longer than mine, my in-laws are slightly more traditional than my parents. It's nice because they really withhold a lot of Indian traditions that my parents don't (as much). But it can also be a little harder to relate to them and understand where Chirag is coming from sometimes having been brought up slightly differently. I'm sure he feels the same way about me sometimes. But I guess this is probably true for most marriages.
Even though Chirag was born and raised in the States, he has a very traditional side to him as well. I think that's really what attracted me to him at first. To me, he somehow encompasses the perfect balance of the "traditional Desi" and the modern husband.
So for today's three things Thursday, I wanted to share three reasons as to why I'm so lucky to be married to my wonderful husband. (Stay tuned for some cheesiness!)
One: He is practical.
I tend to live on cloud nine and think a lot with my heart versus my brain. Chirag is the total opposite. He really thinks things through before acting on them. Sometimes when I ask him for advice, I almost get so annoyed because it will be something so practical and easy, but something that would have never crossed my mind in the first place. When I'm ready to buy a super extravagant teal colored sofa for our living room, he sways me towards practical, yet stylish grey version instead. He definitely keeps me grounded!
I have learned a lot from him over the years and I think he has learned to be more spontaneous and live a little on the edge with me once in a while as well. ;)
Two: He is very helpful.
Traditional Indian husbands are seldom very helpful to women. I really can't blame them entirely because it is in the way that they were raised and what is "norm" to them. They are raised to be the breadwinners and the woman is in charge of the house the kids.
However, in this day and age that is no longer the case. Lucky for me, even though my MIL is quiet traditional in some ways, she has raised her son to be super helpful around the house.
I have never really had to ask my husband for any help. He just automatically does it. He will help with all different types of chores in the house and is especially understanding when I have long hours at work. He also spoils by making breakfast on some weekends with his delicious omelette. He has even been a positive influence on my Dad and my Mom is always thanking him of that! :)
Three: He is understanding and caring.
Chirag and I are total opposites and it all became even more apparent after we got married. So, it wasn't always easy for either of us to truly understand where the other person was coming from.
Over the years, I have really seen my husband put in the effort to better understand me. He has come to realize that just because my thoughts and feeling don't make sense to him, doesn't mean that they aren't important in our marriage. It's not always easy for him, but I do see him trying and to me that's what love is all about.
We have both had to learn to adapt to the needs and wants of the other person.... learn to agree to disagree... and pick our battles. Marriage is a journey together and with each passing day we come to understand each other slightly better than we did yesterday.
Let's be real... I haven't been on cloud nine for all four years, but I truly have enjoyed our journey thus far. I believe that a marriage does take a lot of work... whether you are consciously putting in the effort or whether the effort just comes to you naturally. It takes two people to be fully involved in building a loving, happy, and lasting relationship together.
For all these reasons and many more, I feel very blessed and happy to be celebrating four years with this wonderful man today. We both try to be a positive influence in each other's lives and like a good challenge... so I'm looking forward to celebrating today by running our very first 5K together!
Here is to many more healthy and happy years together.
Are you interested joining #3TT? Please visit the hosts: Salma, Raj, or Nisha's blog, for all the details on how to join the linkup. It's a great way to meet some incredible bloggers and share any three things you'd like... the rules are super simple, so be sure to join in!
Are you celebrating something special this week?
Happy anniversary Reshma and Chirag, may you stay blessed now and always .
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Anima! :)
DeleteHAPPY ANNIVERSARY! Vishnu and I dated for 6 years before getting engaged, got married a year later, and have been together for almost 10 years (on July 4th!) now. And even though we knew e/o really well before marriage, there are always a few fun surprises! But that's half the fun (or sometimes frustrations) I guess!
ReplyDeleteThanks Parita! Wow, 10 years is a long time... congratulations to you two as well! :)
DeleteVery important to have a man who can help around the house. Unfortunately lots of Indian men want a wife who will cook, clean, and work! Your husband is a keeper!
ReplyDeleteVery true, Nisha! I got pretty lucky :)
Deletehappy anniversary you two :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Dixya! :)
DeleteHappy Anniversary to you both! I love the things you shared about your relationship. It really sounds like you two are a great compliment to each other! From everything I've heard about marriage, it really is a compromise of who you are and how you were raised...but can truly be a blessing. You have an awesome attitude about letting your differences be what you love about him!
ReplyDelete♥ perfectly Priya
Thanks, Priya! Can't say marriage is always easy... but it's definitely a fun ride! :)
Delete